RaShawn-Renée goes LIVE with Dr. Lisa Williams
Our Wednesday Wisdom series begins with a discussion on the importance of RELATIONSHIPS…. If you’ve ever been in a relationship…. If you’re in a relationship…. If you desire to be in a relationship…. THIS Is where you want to be! ….Remember to tune in LIVE on our Facebook Page Wednesdays @ 11:11amPST 🌸
RaShawn: Hello everyone that’s watching right now, you are here on our Facebook live and we have the magnificent, extraordinary, dynamic, superlative, amazing, powerhouse woman on the call joining us today. Her name is Dr. Lisa Williams, and Lisa is dynamic. And I asked her right before this Facebook live, what’s your favorite song? And she told me something and we’re going to play it just for a little while because we can. And I think it’s okay because we aren’t doing anything with this. It’s just a little bit of love for Lisa. So let’s hope that it’s okay that we get to play this for us.
So this is the song, I want to be happy. She said this is one of her favorite songs. And the whole purpose, the purpose of this call, the purpose of being with you today is because I want you to be happy, Lisa wants you to be happy, everyone at Real Truth International wants you to be happy and it sure starts with your relationship, every relationship in your life, every one of them is an important one. And every one of them, you must command it so that it is exactly what you want it to be in your life.
So just listen to Lisa’s favorite song for a moment, you want to be happy. Lisa, tell them, you want them to be happy.
Lisa: I want them to be happy. I love this song because it said, if you want to be happy, it’s up to you. You have to surrender. When you get tired of crying, you get tired of heartache and you’re really ready to be happy, then surrender, turn your life over. You know, it’s all within us to do that. So that’s why it’s one of my favorite songs.
RaShawn: Thank you. And, it’s the first time that I’m hearing it when you exposed it to me and I am so happy because I choose nothing, but being happy. Absolutely, to be happy. So we’re going to say, we want you to be happy. Lisa, who was this song by? Kirk Franklin?
Lisa: Kirk Franklin
RaShawn: So for those of you that are watching, if you want to listen to this and hear the lyrics and let it vibrate in you so you feel happy, that’s the name of it. I want to be happy, by Kirk Franklin.
Thank you. And I liked so much where this ended, take the wheel, and that takes us perfectly into this conversation because this conversation is all about taking the wheel of your life so that you absolutely can have the relationships that you want to have. Because what comes to my emails, what comes to the women that I’m talking to and the men, what I hear from them, it’s a perpetual conversation of the lack of being fully seen in a relationship, of the desire to have a relationship, of the feeling insecure while in a relationship, not feeling valued in a relationship.
And as you know, Lisa, that the principle that I stand by and what I communicate to every person I know is that you matter, you are precious, you are valuable, you are the prize. You absolutely are the prize. And in our societal construct and in the familiar construct most often, that’s not anything that we’re taught. We’re not anchored in that knowing that we’re the prize. So then we have these relationships wanting someone to show us our value, prove our value to us. And yet if we don’t know it, how can they know it? How is that possible? That’s like getting in that beautiful Bentley and asking it to drive itself. I mean, it could be an automatic driving car, but not yet. Right? And then what’s the pleasure of that, not having the ability to control the automobile that you own. You got to own yourself first.
So as I shared with you right before we started, I said, Lisa, I want you to tell everybody that’s looking at this Facebook live and for all of the thousands of people that will look at it in the rerecording, I want you to just talk about your fabulousness and how it is a result of you getting into a great relationship with yourself that you have been able to grow this tremendous business and that you have been able to grow yourself by having ownership and learning, you’re the prize. So my beautiful dynamic, amazing, spectacular, powerhouse woman who is the prize, tell them.
Lisa: Thank you so much Shawn for having me here on your show. And you know, you are one of those things in my life that makes me sparkle. I have a series of talks about every moment in every life, there’s something that sparkles even in the darkness and you are one of those people for me. So again, I’m just so honored to be here today.
To answer your question, you’re right, I had to get into a really good loving relationship with myself. And I had to understand I am the prize. And I didn’t, I’ll be honest, I didn’t understand that as a child. You’re right, you’re not taught it. Now my mom would say things, you know, like, you know, you should be treated with respect but it didn’t register for me the depth of her motherly advice.
As I grew older and found myself in relationship with others that weren’t necessarily encouraging and positive, but it also mirror the relationship I had with myself and the relationship I had with myself was not one of deep admiration and respect and honoring of who I am. And it took many years and many obstacles, many challenges, many heartbreaks for me to actually get there to realize that you’re right Shawn, we, each of us are the prize and it resides within us all the time.
RaShawn: Yes, it does, Lisa, a hundred percent. And in that, let me know and I can chat, absolutely. So I’m reading the questions over here because now questions are starting to come in. So, absolutely you can. Yes, we will answer a few questions. Yes, thank you.
Hello everyone that is looking, Lisa wave at everybody.
Lisa: Hi everybody.
RaShawn: So absolutely, what you just said is so accurate and let me read something, that’s why I actually put my glasses on. Right? I want to read something from 44 Hours & 21 Minutes, I marked the page and it says, ladies, we are talking to you specifically right now, men, we are talking to you to affirm that what we are saying is true right now. And it says, “When a man cherishes you, his actions reflect his feelings consistently, not sometime, not a one and done, not just when you’re dating, not just when he wants to be your lover, not just for whatever, it is consistent.” And then it reads, “You are the prize. And when a man sees the value of you, he will make heaven and earth move for you because he wants you to experience happiness.” He wants you to experience happiness. I have so much to say about that.
And then it goes on to say, “You have to know your real value of you before someone else can see it. Learning more about yourself, understanding your relatedness to men, making self-honoring choices will create a life of bliss, a sense of fulfillment that can only be described as feelings of wholeness, peacefulness, and wellbeing.”
That’s the truth. That is absolutely the truth.
In the dynamic, Lisa and I now both live incredible lives, like the kind of lives that we get to kind of pinch ourselves, like really, this is it? This is what we created, right? And we have made the decision that we want more and better or more and different or more and whatever it looks. So what I’m saying is we want to add on.
And the reason we decided to do this live and talk about relationships today is because right now with this COVID virus happening around the world, we are in a situation where men and women are in relationship with each other and they are not liking each other at all. There is more domestic violence happening now. There was a report a couple of weeks ago that said that the numbers, which I found so interesting, numbers for filing for divorce was up. I mean, understandably so because people have gotten together and said, wait, do I really want to be married to this person?
And what’s so telling always is that people are hungry to have intimate relationships. And so we decided to have this talk because you absolutely can have an intimate relationship. You absolutely can be cherished. Right, Lisa?
Lisa: Oh, absolutely.
RaShawn: You absolutely can have it where you wake up in the morning and you’re smiling just from waking up because you love the life that you’re living and it is in a relationship and you look over, you just kind of want to go snuggle up to what’s over there because you’re so pleased with the relationship that you’re in. That’s a possibility that exists.
Lisa: Oh yes. Most definitely.
RaShawn: And so the communication, the takeaway for you today is to know it’s all a journey. Lisa and I were talking about this before. And I want you to tell those that are looking right now, talk about your business right now, talk about the deal with over, talk about those beautiful dolls behind you, talk about you having to get the journey, talk about the seeding of one of our conversations, talk about how you had to make the self-honoring choice to own all of you, to reveal the Grandeur-Of-You and how it had to start with the relationship with you. Talk about that, but brag about you because there’s so much that celebrate about you.
Lisa: It was great about me to have great friends like Shawn. Truly, it is one of the things that’s great about me, truly. Because when you get in those places where again, it’s dark and you can’t see your way through, and you’re wondering should I be doing this, is it worth it? You need a dear friend like Shawn that would anchor you in the truth, the truth of who you are and the truth of the possibilities. And then you’ll always see that bright light that sparkles. And you are one of those people for me, Shawn, and you always see the bright side. I don’t care what it is, Shawn sees the bright side. And when you have a person that can see the bright side, then you are able to gradually get yourself to a place where you could see the bright side.
But my life has been like all of our lives, it’s been one of ups and downs. And you know, there was a time in the earlier phase of my life when I was younger, my younger self, when I would look at the downs as just these terrible things and why did they have to happen and I must be doing something wrong and I’m certainly not worthy. And this is why, you know, the other shoe has dropped. I mean, I live that way more years than I want, decades as a matter of fact. Always kind of waiting for the next shoe to drop, the next negative thing to happen.
But then, and there were plenty of things that would happen, that would reinforce that. And gradually I came like, what is it, is it an oyster that turns into a Pearl? It’s like the pressure of life got me to a place where I said, I can’t do it now. I consider myself as you Shawn, and many of us, all of us listening on this radio or on this live today, we’re all brilliant, we’re all intellectually brilliant.
And I had gone to school forever, as my friends liked to say, I had gone all the way through till I had a PhD, two masters and some other graduate degrees. But the whole point is that my intellect wasn’t helping me. I couldn’t think my way through my situation and it’s because my situation or problems weren’t because of my mind, it was because of my not knowing who I was.
It really, it centered on that, I didn’t know who I was. So since I didn’t know who I was, and I didn’t know my own internal strength, power and perseverance, there were lots of decisions that I made that weren’t well, they weren’t good for me. They weren’t good decisions, but they were safe decisions.
RaShawn: Sorry to interrupt you. Just one second. And then I want you to start back at not safe decisions, because that was so brilliant. And I want everyone to take what you said and make a deposit in their heart that says, you can know it all intellectually, you can run a great business, you can run a great household, you can be the top girl, boy in your sphere of friends and family. And until you make the heart-head connection, and understand who you really are independent of what it looks like financially, independent of what your conditioning has been and all of the things that are reinforcing this negative self-talk, we have to excavate that so we can move into our real true and then make the choice to live with power and out of all of the training, I was saying to my husband the other day, I said, I have multiple PhDs in experiential learning because my whole life has been my learning to continuously teach me to up-level. And had I not had every experience and they were not easy experiences to live through, not easy experiences to eventually confess to myself, they happened to me and still confess and forgive myself. Right? And it changed the idea, I had to get really clear. And this is what I hear you saying and this is the part that I want them to drop in their hearts, you have to get really clear and tell yourself the truth.
Lisa told herself the truth. Because we all lie to ourselves about who we are, until we excavate and examine, we just live in that perpetual cycle of wash, rinse, repeat.
Lisa: You said that beautifully because you’re right. Until you really look at yourself and your own strength, you keep repeating the same patterns. You don’t even realize it, but you’re making decisions, again, safe decisions that reinforce you’re not good as you think you are, you’re not as smart as you are and you’re lacking something, you’re lacking education or you’re lacking money, or you’re lacking a maid, or you’re lacking experience. The mind will tell you for whatever reason, you are not good enough, you are not smart enough and therefore you do not deserve the life that you want.
And it took years for me to get that that was just a lie and that I didn’t have to listen to it. Number one, I could ignore it. Number two, and that I could explore within me who and what am I really. What am I? What is that within me that keeps me functioning? I’m talking about now bodily functions. What is that that keeps my heart beating, my liver functioning, my eyes blinking? If I say, move a hand, what is that power that makes that hand move? That’s beyond my thoughts. And there’s some being that believes that I’m worthy enough to be able to move, to speak, to eat, to function, to move my hand. There is something within me that believes enough and loves enough and guides enough for me to be able to do that.
So what had happened is I had to use the experiences of life and they were a lot of challenging and negative ones. There were people who would literally tell me I wasn’t good enough, I wasn’t pretty enough, I wasn’t smart enough, I didn’t have what it took, literally. And at that level of my thinking and in my heart, I believed them. So they’ve reinforced it.
But as life kept getting harder and harder, I had to look at other options besides the mind and instead of looking outside and when I started to look inside, I realized that I’m a whole heck of a lot stronger than I thought. And not only do I have smarts in terms of intellectual smart, there is an innate wisdom that doesn’t necessarily speak to me all the time in words, but it certainly speaks to me in a feeling and it’ll say, go this way or don’t go that way. And it’s that guidance that I have used to grow the company.
When I started, we had like one doll and one retailer. Now we’ve grown into, I can’t even count the number of dolls. We’re probably at 300 skews or more. We have girl doll, boy dolls for every age, every ethnicity wherein you know, all the major retailers, Walmart, Target, Macy’s, Amazon, just keep going on and our dolls are there. And it’s not because I knew everything about making dolls because I still don’t, I’m still learning. It’s not that I had money. I still don’t, I’m still learning. It’s not that I had connections, I don’t, I’m still learning, but there was something in me that once I scratched away the surface of negative thoughts and negative thinking and societal’s limitations, once I scratch through that, I realized that there was a wealth of knowledge, a wealth of intuition, a wealth of power and strength that then I was able to surrender to that. And that’s really key. That’s why I love that song by Kirk Franklin, because it’s about surrendering. If you want to be happy, if you’re tired of crying, if you’re tired of the pain, then let go.
And the question is, what am I letting go to? Am I letting go to just people running my life? No. You’re letting go of the limited thinking that have held you captive all of your life and you’re depending upon an inner power and inner strength with the relationship of you and you, you’re leaning on that to guide you. And once I fully embrace that, then my life changed. Relationships began to blossom. Business began to grow and expand. Everything just became magical. And I know it’s hard for people to grasp it, but that’s how it happens.
RaShawn: Exactly. Bravo! And that is accurate. And so we were scheduled to be here for 21 minutes, right? So now we’ve gone about 24 minutes. I just want to say one thing and then we’ll wrap up. Because you know, at Real Truth, we like to over deliver and we want to make sure, we want them to be happy. It’s all about you and you is every person that’s listening to this now, and you is every person that will be listening to this later, it’s all about you.
So in 44 Hours & 21 Minutes: A Woman’s Truth and Power, I call it inner guidance. Well, you know, you’ve read the book, when Lisa first finished the book, well, Lisa, what was your response when you first finished?
Lisa: Wow! I mean your book from the first word of the book, you pulled in, you captured, you can’t just say, I’m just gonna read a page or two, because if you open that book, if you read this one you’re drawn in and it is a ride and a roller coaster ride of personal discovery that will not let you go until the end of the book. And it’s so relatable. I just kept thinking, I know her. I mean, I know you in person but I know that girl, I know that woman that was evolving and coming into herself because she was a reflection of me.
And so that’s what I related to her so strongly. And that’s why I couldn’t wait to finish, every day I couldn’t wait to get back to another chapter to continue the journey. It’s really a gift. It’s insightful, inspirational, educational and affirming, it’s very affirming. It’s a gift. So thank you for writing it.
RaShawn: You are welcome. Thank you very much. And that was the purpose. The purpose was so that every reader could identify themselves. And I remember the first response I got from a man on how much it helped his life. I was really surprised because I did not write it for men. And then I started getting feedback from other men. And then I started getting feedback from men in same-sex relationships. And then I started getting feedback from women in same-sex relationships. And it really helped me understand, this is a universal language. The language of hiding yourself, the language of living the conditioned life, the universal language of, well, let me say something that later they’re going to say you shouldn’t have said that, but I’m going to say it anyway.
When we watched George Floyd be murdered on television or whatever instrument, social media you saw it on, and the man who had the title of police officer had his knee on his neck. I shared with everyone that spoke to me about it. This was a cry. The reason the world took foot and stood up was because metaphorically speaking, the world is saying, get your foot off my neck. We are all so exhausted by living lives that are not fulfilling and pretending with the acquisition of things or with certain people around us that that makes us whole. No. It’s a universal language. 44 Hours & 21 Minutes: A Woman’s Truth and Power, is a universal language saying, whatever you’ve done in your life, use it for your learning. Don’t let anyone take your voice. Don’t let anyone navigate the life that you should live. Have an intimate relationship with your inner guidance. As you said, that which created you, that which makes your hands move. That which makes you smile, just because you said I wanted to smile inside, you didn’t have to do anything, we didn’t have to do anything. That which makes your heartbeat.
And so every Wednesday, we’re going to have Wednesday Wisdom conversation. And it’s always going to be to take a little slice of wisdom, put it in your heart, put my hand on my heart. Lisa, put your hand on your heart, put your right hand over your heart, you feel your heartbeat right there? And then take your left hand and put a top of it. And let’s say to every person who’s listening, your life matters.
Lisa: Yes, your life matters.
RaShawn: And you really matter. So do yourself the honor, make the self-honoring choice to learn you more so you can love you more. And then more love will be present in every area of your life.
Didn’t that feel good, just holding your heart and saying that, taking that in?
Lisa: Yes. And just hearing you say that every life matters, everyone’s life, it does because we’re all a part of this beautiful divine mosaic. And if there’s one string that’s missing, it destroys the beauty of the mosaic. Everyone is needed. Everyone’s essential. Everyone is worthy. Everyone is loved.
RaShawn: Absolutely. I could not have said it better.
So beautiful, precious, dynamic, amazing splendid woman who makes self-honoring choices, who knows yourself so well, who continues to say yes to herself and living in your grandeur, thank you for being here on this Wednesday Wisdom day. And listeners, those of you that are listening, looking now and later, take whatever you can, take it all, take a bite size, take the last bit of it, whatever you can do, take from this a piece of wisdom, use it in your life to move your life forward because you so matter.
And then I want to go [Kiss], grab that kid, put it in your heart and keep it there.
Lisa: Oh, thank you so much, Shawn.
RaShawn: Thank you beautiful lady. So we are going to say bye now. Thank you for looking. Thank you for listening and it’s Wednesday Wisdom and we’ll see you next week. Bye!